Tag: Things That Make Me Go Mmmruh

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Cooler Than the Other Side of the Pillow

February 7, 2012 by in category Archives tagged as , , ,

How’s this for a hero:
He strides into the story, ripped and ready, but with an understated calm reminiscent of Humphrey Bogart, Mr. Darcy, or Aragorn. He makes things happen with a mere flick of his eyes and remains in control of all he surveys. But this hero is a flesh and soul man – capable of making mistakes, but even more adept at shaking them off and getting on with it. He’s got a backstory of royalty, yet he’s worked like a coal miner to get everything he has. As the story surges towards its climax, he gets sweatier and dirtier, but the eyes remain steady. The battle he’s fighting makes your heart stutter and your breath catch – he makes you gasp and scream – both in ecstasy and in terror. You’ve thought about leaving him – maybe you should have! – but you never could. The promise of the next time was always too deliciously inviting. And there is always a next time – he never lets you down. When he finally vanquishes the demons and sweeps you away on a gush of euphoria, you love him with all your heart: the challenges, the heartbreak, the agony of the past make every moment in the afterglow unbearably sweet. You want it all again and again, and so rich is his potential that you’ll be plumbing the depths of his character for sequels to come.
“That’s Eli, man, cooler than the other side of the pillow.”
So said New York Giants wide receiver Mario Manningham about his quarterback Eli Manning just moments after their Superbowl victory Sunday night.
And for those of you who don’t like football, I get it. I spent 30 years of my life resenting televised sports. In my family, guys watched sports as they shooed girls out of the room. Lucky for me, I grew up and married a guy who loves football so much that he loves explaining it to me, teaching me, sharing it with me. Football is smart, complicated and chock full of amazing history. To get a sense of this, just check out Don Cheadle’s NFL Playoffs commercials on YouTube. (My favorite is the one titled “Joe.”)
And if you missed the Superbowl, NFL Network is replaying the game Wednesday at 8. And the replay is better than the televised broadcast. NFL films gives amazing shots and angles of the action, sound bytes from players and coaches who were miked up throughout the game, and best of all, they cut out all the downtime between plays so all you get is sixty minutes of rocking action that will leave you breathless. 
Check it out. You just might find yourself inspired.

-Geralyn Ruane
Ten year New York Giants fan and lifelong fan of men in general
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May 8, 2009 by in category Archives tagged as

17 Again? As If.

by Geralyn Ruane

17 Again. Okay, so I went to see the movie twice so far. The plot is riddled with nonsensical gaps, but there’s still plenty of mmmruh to keep me pleasantly distracted for the 102 minutes or so. And sure, the idea intrigues scores of us: if I could do it all over, with what I know now… But the truth is, I wouldn’t be 17 again, not for all the condoms in the vending machine.

Low riders and thongs? So not me. But I remember myself at 17, trying to latch onto any fashion craze I could afford. So I am sure if I got zapped back to high school I’d be squeezing into a G-string for prom. Plus, I had no confidence as a teen and my dating life limped along, hobbled by my bruised psyche. Get this – when I was 17, I dated guys who didn’t love animals!!! And drove gas guzzlers!!! Sure, I was 4 sizes smaller, but what difference does that make? I still felt fat all the time. I was in better shape, but back then my shin splints hurt like hell. And in ’89, I was on the pill, an aspect of Western medicine I’ve completely eschewed since that stroke in ’96.

Truth is, I like the person I’ve evolved into. I’m not done chasing my dreams or shy about conjuring up new ones to pursue. Mmmruh! Sure, I’ve made some mistakes along the way – I think of the chances I should have taken, the houses I didn’t buy, the vaccinations I should have never allowed – but I would not go back. Well, maybe back to that day in the vet’s office. Yes, definitely back there. But other than that, I like my thirties A LOT. Recently, I tutored a college senior, and his place where we studied smelled like college boys. Not a bad smell, just distinctive and immediately recognizable. Oh yeah, and the room was decorated with beer – signs, bottles, cans, posters. AND I WAS SO GLAD I WAS NOT IN COLLEGE ANYMORE. I am also way grateful no longer to be in my twenties. God, was I stupid in my twenties!

You know, I did not go to my 5th, 10th or 15th high school reunions. Why would I? High school was mostly unhappy for me. Plus, I am not the super in-shape best-selling novelist I hoped to be by age 25. But then Jason Smith, a kid from my high school class who is organizing our upcoming reunion, tracked me down through this very OCC Romance Writers’ Blog. He told me about our upcoming reunion and invited me to join our 20th Reunion Website.

Aaaahhh!!!!! But I’m not super in-shape!! I’m not a best-selling novelist!! I haven’t even fucked anyone famous!! I can’t go back!

But Jason worked so hard to find me, and I remembered him as such a nice kid, so I joined the website.

And oh, my goodness gracious! Would you believe that all those kids from my graduating class – we all just grew up to be people! People!! With whom it wasn’t scary at all to reconnect. In fact, catching up with my updated past has been fantastic!

For the first time in my life, I feel completely comfortable in my own skin. Mmmruh! I feel good. I feel right. And all I had to do was face one of my greatest fears – THE KIDS FROM HIGH SCHOOL!!! (You should be hearing the Psycho shower scene music in your head right now.) So now I am going to face another of my shark-eating-me-in-the-ocean-at-night-type fears (cue the Psycho strings.): SENDING MY BOOK OUT TO PUBLISHERS AND AGENTS!!!!!!

I’m going to do it, damn it, and sell my book. Mmmmmruh!

Though our winsome blogger has resigned herself to the stupid loss of her 200 bucks(see her Jnauary’09 blog), she is gratified to see that possible misuse of said 200 bucks is under federal investigation. Other than throwing her money away, Geralyn also appears in the award-winning internet short comedy film Daryl From OnCar and co-hosts the radio show Better Times After 50 on AdviceRadio.com Her short story “Jane Austen Meets the New York Giants” is published in the New York Times Bestselling anthology The Right Words at the Right Time, Volume 2.

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February 8, 2009 by in category Archives tagged as

The Fix Is In!
…the romantic fix, that is.

by Geralyn Ruane

It’s cold and rainy outside, the news just gets more and more horrifically unbelievable, and Valentine’s Day lurks just around the corner. So, in case any of these reasons make you want to curl up to watch a wonderful romance, here are some dusty gems, pushed to the back of the jewel case . . .

In Crossing Delancy (1988) Amy Irving tries the traditional route – she lets her bubbe set her up with a nice young man. But then she decides to pursue romantic ideas of her own. Mmmruh!

Did you ever notice that many “romantic comedies” aren’t that funny? Well, The Guru is hilarious! And sooo heartwarming and curl-your-toes romantic! The Guru (2003) not The Love Gurustars Jimmy Mistry, Heather Graham, Marisa Tomei, Christine Baranski and Michael McKean. A winsome super-star wannabe arrives in New York from India and accidentally gets cast in a porno and then inadvertantly becomes famous as a self-help love guru. The stuff is pure comedy, not at all dirty except for using the words “wood” and “snatch.” And the love story between the hero and his co-star is surprisingly sweet and amazingly romantic! Mmmruh!

In Vivacious Lady (1938), shy botany professor Jimmy Stewart meets, falls in love with and marries nightclub singer Ginger Rogers in the space of one day. Then he takes her home and has to present her to his conservative family…and the hijinx begin. Mmmruh!

You will laugh your butt off when you watch Man’s Favorite Sport? (1968). Paula Prentiss finds out that dreamy fishing expert Rock Hudson is a complete phony who never fished a day in his life. So, she threatens to reveal his secret unless he does exactly what she wants. Jeez Louise, I love this one! Mmmruh!

Mogambo (1953) In Africa, big game hunter Clark Gable must choose between devil-may-care Ava Gardner, a woman he does not respect, and prim and proper Grace Kelly, a woman he wants despite her having a husband. Mmmruh!

In Murphy’s Romance (1985), struggling, sassy single mom Sally Field becomes friends, and maybe more, with the wise old town druggist, James Garner. Just perfect. Mmmruh!

Wild River (1960). Montgomery Clift from the Tennessee Valley Authority must kick Lee Remick and her family off the island home they have always known to make way for the new dam and the flooding it will cause. This one is intense, passionate and really sexy. Mmmruh!

Pick your poison and get your fix. Mmmruh!

Though she makes her film debut in Daryl From OnCar, our winsome blogger adores same-sex romantic movies such as Latter Days and Imagine Me and You . Geralyn co-hosts the radio show Better Times After 50 on AdviceRadio.com and her short story “Jane Austen Meets the New York Giants” is published in the New York Times Bestselling anthology The Right Words at the Right Time, Volume 2.

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January 8, 2009 by in category Archives tagged as

John Edwards Owes Me 200 Bucks!

by Geralyn Ruane

That’s right. Two hundred dollars. That’s how much I donated to his campaign last winter.
But he used MY MONEY to pay for his mistress!!!!!! He hired her to do a bogus job she was marginally qualified for just so he could have her handy along on the campaign trail! And part of my hard-earned, thinly-stretched paycheck went to her salary!
But it’s a new year with an awesome new president, so you’d think the smoke would stop shooting out of my ears and I would cease seeing scarlet every time I think of my 200 bucks. But I cannot just let it go.
Because it is partially my fault.
I invested my money into a campaign I believed in. I did that. Me. I’m responsible for for my decisions with my own money. True, he lied to me. Seriously, how much can John Edwards care about the middle class if he used our scraped-together dollars to pay off his chick to cheat with? But I’m in my thirties and reputed to be intelligent, and I’m surprised that a politician lied to the country? Shame on me.
I should have been more careful with my money. More thoughtful. I think from now on, we all must be more conscientious with our money and with our trust in public assertions and institutions. In 2008, so many people lost savings, security, homes and livelihoods at the hands of shady lenders, irresponsible regulators, overpaid CEO’s and downright swindlers – none of whom will ever feel even a fraction of the suffering they’ve caused. None of whom will ever pay their victims back. Those Americans who lost out are just plain screwed, because the bailouts don’t bail out the ones who really need help.
So where is the mmmruh! in all this? It’s not in the past, where Black Tuesday and Enron lurk to mock us; it’s not in the present, where corporate bigwigs in golden parachutes float over blocks and blocks of foreclosed homes. It’s in the future, where vigilance must be our watchword. There will always be devious sharks out there, trolling for prey to fill their bellies, and they don’t care how much we scream and bleed. But on January 20, a new ship will break through the thick red water, offering passage to those willing to lend a hand on deck. So climb aboard, but be prepared to work your ass off for a better tomorrow.

Geralyn Ruane’s favorite numbers are 18 and 1, and it’s January so she’s getting excited despite Plaxico’s debilitating aim. She co-hosts the radio show Better Times After 50 on AdviceRadio.com and her short story “Jane Austen Meets the New York Giants” is published in the New York Times Bestselling anthology The Right Words at the Right Time Volume 2.

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Things That Make Me Go Mmmruh!

December 7, 2008 by in category Archives tagged as

Gold, Frankincense and Mmmruh!

by Geralyn Ruane

‘Twas the month before Christmas
And all through the season
People on Earth
Abandoned all reason

The black march on Friday,
Yanked-back civil rights,
All the jobs lost,
The oil and the fights.

What the hell happened
To good will to all men?
If we don’t do it at Christmas
Then wherefore and when

Will people stop giving it up to the fear
And instead give their love
To the people right here?

On Equality, on Charity!
On the Tenacity to Cope!
On Tolerance! On Patience!
On Niceness and Hope!

To the top of our hearts
And our souls and our minds!
Live and let live, and keep trying to find

The kindness and caring
The strength and the love
Because it’s all about us
Not what’s below or above.

Though she makes her film debut in Daryl From OnCar, our winsome blogger adores the holiday movies Holiday (1938) and The Man in the Santa Clause Suit (1979) . Geralyn co-hosts the radio show Better Times After 50 on AdviceRadio.com and her short story “Jane Austen Meets the New York Giants” is published in the New York Times Bestselling anthology The Right Words at the Right Time, Volume 2.

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